Friday, April 13, 2012


I'm working nights now. Oh yeah I told you that already. I don't even know my own name right now.

I slept through my physical therapy appointment today. I thought I had set my alarm for 2:00, but no dice. The hubs woke me up at 3:45 wondering what the heck I was doing still sleeping. Which I told him was a good question.... dang it....I love physical therapy.

Okay now onto a more serious topic. Since I have been "off running" for quite some time now, I have ample evidence as to the effects not working out has had. Obviously, I have gained a few pounds.
Beyond that:
1. problems sleeping
2. emotional roller-coaster
3. confidence
4. the world is ending

You runners can probably attest to the sleep and emotional stuff. Most of us run for the stress relief and the "high" (and obviously health benefits). The confidence is something I wasn't expecting. I knew from the very beginning of this that there would be a lesson in this trial. My guess was that running has become too important to me and is almost a "false God." While that may be part of it, it also has taught me that I need to find other reasons to be proud of myself than just running.
I have hid behind the shield of running for years, always clinging to it as my differentiating factor.  But...I have noticed I'm mentally slipping in other areas. Self-worth should not be dependant on what I do. Self-worth should be dependant on what's inside. What's inside is God's treasure.


  1. wow, this post is amazing and really hit me because i kno for a fact i base a wee bit (okay prolly a lot more!) of my own happiness, confidence and more on running or getting my own little workout in...when in the end, yes it's something that makes me happier and healthier, but at the same time, in the BIG picture it is, in the end, just running.

    keep on remember the BIGGER picture and being happy and confident in how awesome u are and kno that u still WILL get back to running eventually...stay tough! :)

  2. Thanks Cait!!! I really appreciate your kind words!

  3. I did the same thing the other day. I was getting really stressed out about buying a car and compromising with my husband...I slept in until 11am! That hasn't happened in YEARS! BTW you were tagged in my blog, happy Liebster award!

  4. I think that part of the reason that I struggled so much at my former job, was because it also took away time and energy to run which left me feeling low.

  5. Even though we are runners, we are more than that. I have learned, with all my injuries, not to base my happiness on running. It's hard, especially when it helps relieve stress. I haven't ran much this year, and much to my surprise.....I survived!